if you see something, say something

the daily taryn - august 26, 2021

Whoever did PR for the saying, “If you see something, say something” needs a stern talkin’ to. Like, yes, it’s great for suspicious behavior in airports. I love knowing (hoping, really) that people are doing their part and looking out for me. Keeping that cute head on a swivel for creeps.

I’m on a campaign to extend this phrase beyond airports and shady people with black bags.

3 daily, non-creepy applications for “if you see something, say something”

1. Compliments, people

See someone wearing a cute shirt? See someone going really woah hard at the gym, so much so it makes you go a little woah harder? See someone help a little granny cross the street? Which, honestly, what a dumb example? Who sees old people crossing the street and gets outta their car and escorts them? That angel deserves an EGOT.

Point is, see something that catches your eye? Say something. Compliment people — friends and strangers. It’s so so easy. Having the thought is 95% of the work, so just complete the job and let it out. If you’ve ever been complimented on your eyes or shoes or well-behaved dog, you know how much power it has to make a day/week/month feel lighter.

2. You good?

Call it my anxiety but my head is quite honestly always on a swivel.

She’s eavesdropping. She’s looking around the party to make sure everyone is okay. She’s playing mall cop, regardless of if she’s in a mall or not.

If you see anything weird — a friend whose energy is off, a waiter who just got yelled at, a mom whose kid is causing grocery store drama — say something. Ask if they’re good. If they need help. Revert to point #1 and compliment them. If offering help or checking in feels like overstepping, just interact. Say something. Let them know you see them.

3. Feedback = a gift

I’m trying to get better with spicy foods. I don’t think I’ll ever be at a place where I’m actively craving something spicy, but I don’t want spice to knock me out or ruin my wheel when it sneaks into a dish. So, I’ve been slowly dipping my toe in the water and ordering it when the stakes are low.

We were at dinner the other night at a place we frequent, where I always order a spicy mezcal margarita. I swear to god, this waiter dropping it off had *clearly* received a massive “this is really fucking spicy” warning from the bartender. This man looked like he’d seen a ghost as he told me the bartender was trying out a new chile syrup.

I said I could handle it.

She could not handle it.

Seriously, it was the spiciest liquid I’ve ever put in my mouth. Even Cammie — a spice queen — was breathing fire after she tried it. So when the waiter came back to check if I was still alive, I told him I was, in fact, not.

Couple minutes later, the bartender walks out with a shiny new normal-level-of-spice marg, and said thanks for the feedback. This was a new syrup and he let it steep too long, so now he knew a little goes a long way.

I *loathe* being the person who sends things back at restaurants, but feedback is a gift. That bartender wants me to like my drink. He made it with pride and joy and excitement at trying a new thing. Me throwing in the towel and saying “ya no can’t do it” is a gift to him and whoever he makes this drink for next.

This extends beyond spice bombs. If someone upsets you, encourages you, worries you, deflates you, say something. People don’t want to hurt people (and if they do, they deserve to hear about it). Your girlfriend wants you to feel appreciated. Your mom wants you to feel heard. Your boss wants you to feel empowered. And if something they did made you think otherwise, say something. Kindly, of course. But do. It’s a gift.

Annnnnd I think that’ll do it for today. Comment whatever you wanna comment. I like when you guys respond to each other. It’s cute.

Talk soon,

Your friend,

Taryn

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