The future you is jealous

very deeply. trust me.

Hellllllllo my people. My loves. My heart.

That sounds sarcastic but it’s not. I love this corner of the internet and the you lovely cuties who willingly put yourselves here.

I hope your week has had at least one little itty bitty special moment. Big ones welcome, of course, but little ones are good too.

The future you is jealous

My peloton is so happy with me lately. After not riding it for nearly a year, I’ve been sitting on her —

Okay no. The personification of the Peloton stops HERE. It must.

I’ve done at least 2 rides a week for the past month, which is math for a lot more than before.

Yesterday’s ride was a doozy. I’m 10 minutes into my 45 minute ride, hunched over my bike in this dingy corner of my 90° garage absolutely sweating my ass off. I’m half regretting being there, half deciding it’s time to beat my personal record. My competitive half takes over. I’m pushing my limits and putting my resistance 3-5 notches higher than the highest they recommend. I’m taking short water breaks, because I’m apparently above hydration.

I’m going back and forth between two very different modes:

I’m obsessively staring at leaderboard, which shows how you’re doing against others and your previous best. I’m slightly concerned with others but deeply concerned with how I’m stacking up against the old me.

Or.

I’m, eyes closed, head bobbing to the music, acting like I’m in the middle of the riding portion of a triathlon and every single eye on the sideline is there to watch me win.

It’s stupid, but it helps. And every time I want to ease up, I’m inspired to keep performing for the crowd of roaring fans who paid to watch me compete (lol).

But it only helps so much.

What keeps me going more is remembering that one day, I will wish I could do this. God willing my health keeps me kickin for many decades, my body will still ache. It will fail. And it will not be able to do the things I can do now.

How crazy is that? Our bodies just age, naturally, whether we like it or not. Or we get hurt or sick or for a million different reasons — we just can’t do what we used to do.

And all we’re gonna want is to be able to work our ass off on a bike in a hot garage.

Push yourself. Get out of breath. Travel. Do hard things. Think about all the things it’s going to be harder to do someday, and do them. Your future self will thank you.

Oh, and I beat my personal best. Cuz I’m a hard bitch like that

.

Talk soon.

your friend,

taryn